Take a step back

Dear Friends,

Tonight I was praying to God that please let this one thing go smooth so I can be happy. I was feeling anxious in my head and in my heart. Then I said, wait a minute, why I'm trying to control something so much and putting all or part of my happiness for this one thing? Why is it so important for certain things to happen in certain way? As soon as I realized that, the weight that was making my heart feel heavy and the queasy feeling I was experiencing in my stomach, suddenly went away. It was as simple as that!

Quite often we want to control life in certain ways and we put our energy into it. And we get disappointed when it doesn't happen. I guess I have gone through that cycle few times now that I know it. So now I can at least be wise and say, don't expect things in life, rather let it happen. I have read stories of people who have everything in their lives snatched away. I recently read the book Half the Sky about women all around the world. Being a woman myself, it is some ways easier to relate to other women. If I can just imagine myself in their situations, where some horrendous things happened to them, when it is not even their fault and they don't deserve any of it, and these women still have their chin up and surviving, shouldn't I realize I should be happy with just what I have here? I think the moment we define happiness with anything external, we get less happy. But the moment we realize everything is right here, we feel less stressed and more happy. It is such a simple concept and I'm happy to say I'm able to see that clearly. So my point being, I'm not going to pray to God next time asking please help me with this situation, rather may be I'll say something like, give me some more of that wisdom and thank you for taking care of me.

Yours Truly,

Ender