Carpe Diem Baby

I am starting to think this is my personal blog rather than a group blog. Either that or everyone else has a life and stuff to do and the best thing I have going on is this blog. However that may be, I just had the most amazing day and I simply have to share it with the world.

Today I attended the "Get Motivated" seminar series at the Austin Convention Center. The event started at 8AM. My friend and I left home at 7:20AM but we got stuck in traffic and circled around a bit trying to find parking so we didn't make it into the hall until 8:40AM. 

The first speaker we heard was Mr.Krish Dhanam. Mr. Dhanam is a trained sales person and a professional motivational speaker. My favorite line from his speech was "Political correctness will be the death of this nation" - the nation in question being America. I also loved his introduction- "I am an Indian by birth and an American by choice". Captures the essence of his mindset very nicely. Suffice to say- he started the day with quite a bang for me. I was captivated.

The next two headliners to speak were Generals Colin Powell and Stanley McChrystal. Mr. McChrystal was interesting and of course he has quite a presence but I do not remember much from his speech. Mr. Powell on the other hand was an impressive speaker. He focused on leadership and his best line for me was "A leader focuses on his follower-ship". Another poignant part of his speech was when he described the mental tribulation that accompanies a step down from power. I had never given much thought to the day after the  Presidential swearing in ceremony. The President and his cabinet are now just common people where they had been the leaders of the free world the night before. Imagine the attitude adjustment that transition demands!

After a lunch break, we got to hear from my top three speakers of the day. First up was Mary Lou Retton. Her speech was preceded by a quick video showing the moments leading up to the first non-eastern European and first American all-around Olympic Gold in gymnastics. I think I would've been hard pressed to find anyone in that room who did not have goose-bumps after watching that video. Ms. Retton's story was just dripping with inspiration. A perfect underdog tale that was delivered with so much passion, I was all choked up when she left the stage. She was followed by the legendary Bill Cosby. Mr.Cosby's theme was Do It. He essentially elaborated on the theme that God helps those who help themselves- the catch being that we must be willing to *do* something other than whining and/or praying. It was funny and absolutely riveting. My list of favorites was rounded up by football coach extraordinaire- Lou Holtz. In terms of delivery and content combined, Mr. Holtz was the leader of the pack today. He spoke about success and what it takes to get to a state of being successful. His simple three point formula- Do the right thing, give your best to everything you do and show people you care- resonated so much with me. I am grateful to have had the opportunity to hear him present it.

The last two headline speakers were Rudy Guiliani and Mary Buffet. Mr. Guiliani's speech was well thought out and well presented. Ms. Buffet's presentation was the most canned of them all but she had words of investing wisdom to share from her famous mentor, Warren Buffet himself.  The only speaker we missed was the former President and CEO of Southwest Airlines- Howard Putnam. 

All in all- a day well spent and truly motivating. I will be back soon with what this day meant to me. I have to rush now to prepare for a work meeting.

Until then- stay inspired...

Dora.. Out.. Woof.

Scientia Potestas est

Today I decided to figure out how to make our blog popular. All that means to me is this: one- receive comments on our posts from someone who is not one of the shady friends and two- get more followers (should be easy considering we have one follower- and that is us!). Let me start by saying that I have nothing more to add on this topic. The rest of this posting is about me- as always!

In my quest to make our blog more popular, I went to Salon.com to check out the blogs posted there. I was hoping to get some quick tips. Why Salon.com? Because in this movie I saw last weekend- Julie&Julia- the title character writes about her cooking challenge in a Salon.com blog and obviously- that worked out for her- since I saw the movie! So I go to the site and get distracted. I start reading a posting in their "Dear Cary" column titled "I chase unavailable men". I mean- that title resonated with me so much- I couldn't help myself. The answer from Cary was rather vague and uninteresting to me but the comments were more enlightening. 

One of the commenters said that she had been there herself. She chased men she could not have until she realized one day that she had really been chasing her need for more attention and love from her emotionally distant mother. Her advice to the writer was to figure out what she was lacking from whom and to make her peace with that situation. It didn't take me long to figure out that I am still hurting from my break-up. After all, I spent the last two years chasing the love and attention of the man I was already in love with. The reality was that the first couple of years were spent in a state of uncertainty as well. Just as I had started to get used to being in a secure, committed relationship, the drama started all over again. I am surprised I even want to have another man in my life. This cynicism has been my security blanket and it has served me well. If knowing is half the battle, then I have made some progress today. I want validation from someone else whom I cannot have. Of course, this is not news to me. I recognized this issue within months of the break-up, but if you had asked me this morning, I would have been so sure that I had healed. Apparently, I am going to have to work on that again.

The other comment that hit home was one that talked about the writer's experience with this guy she had met through work. She had felt a connection with him but had later learnt that he was unavailable for whatever reason. But she was persistent- the next time she met him- she started scoping him out again. So the commenter called her out on her stalker-ish behavior and sympathized with the man. Oh boy, have I been there! And it just makes me feel so small, I want to crawl under the bed and stay there forever. I hope I learn from this awful mea culpa! Note to self: when someone says no- just say good luck and walk away. The world does work in black and white when it comes to the things that matter.

To my anonymous reader: If you have something to say: please leave a comment.

Dora... Out... Woof

First love

This past week, I have been thinking about what my passions are. Recently, I have been feeling empty inside. I have been missing the seething intensity that you experience when talking about or doing something that is close to your heart. 

As a student, poetry always stirred my emotions. Today I decided to go back to one of my favorite poets of all time- Percy Bysshe Shelley. I spent the past half hour reading and re-reading one of his classics- Ozymandias.   You can only do justice to reciting a poem like this when you not only understand the words but you also appreciate the delicate nuances of his play with the language. It took me five to six readings to fully grasp and interpret the poem. 

I also learnt today that Ozymandias is written about a real king- the great Pharaoh of Egypt Ramesses. Shelley wrote about the statue of the Pharaoh before it was brought to England. The story goes that Shelley and a friend had a bet about which one of them could create verse about the statue first. And thus was born one of the most beautiful sonnets of our time. 

For now, I will settle for reliving one of my childhood passions- my love of beautiful, classic, English poetry.

Ozymandias- by Percy Bysshe Shelley

I met a  traveler from an antique land
Who said- Two vast and trunkless legs of stone
Stand in the desert. Near them in the sand,
Half sunk, a shattered visage lies, whose frown
And wrinkled lip and sneer of cold command
Tell that its sculptor well those passions read
Which yet survive, stamped on these lifeless things,
The hand that mocked them and the heart that fed.
And on the pedestal these words appear:
"My name is Ozymandias, King of Kings,
Look on my works, ye mighty and despair."
Nothing beside remains. Round the decay
Of that colossal wreck, boundless and bare
The lone and level sands stretch far away.

Dora.. Out.. Woof

What does honor even mean?

The Penn State child abuse scandal broke out this past weekend. It is simply horrendous that this can happen in one of the most respected universities in the country. I do not understand how we as a society can tolerate such behavior in adults. Aren't we supposed to protect our children? What makes this particular scandal worse than normal is that the prominent players involved are specifically associated with children and teens and their development through sporting activities. These people are coaches and University officials. These people are the role models for the little league coaches and the little league players. These people are the ones who preach success with honor or not at all. 

Child abuse is one of those issues that gets my blood boiling. It scares me. In general people find children irresistible. They are cute, trusting and filled with an incredible energy that makes your heart happy. And I believe they also make you feel important and invincible. If you help them reach a book on a shelf too high for them, they are thrilled. It is so easy to make them happy. It is also so easy to get them to do what you want. A little bribe or a scolding will do the trick more often than not. And that makes them easy targets for the vile adult mind. Protecting our children's mind, body and soul is one of our main responsibilities.  We just cannot interpret this to mean that this responsibility extends only as far as each of our own biological children. Child abuse makes us worse than animals- even animals do not violate their young ones.

So going back to Penn State- what makes it harder for me to accept all this talk about anything becoming a factor in the decision to report or not report the accusations to the authorities is the realization that these people did not recognize that their silence was making them enablers. Or did they realize it and they figured their football program was more important. As a self proclaimed football fanatic, that just makes me sick to the stomach. In any case- this is many times worse than choosing to do nothing to help or interfere in the life of a person who might be addicted to drugs. In that case- the person you choose to not help is the victim of the disease. In the case of Penn State, the entire group of "responsible" citizens decided to not stop the offender. And in the process, they allowed him to continue to create a set of victims that would have never existed. 

I will write again on this subject- as I work my way through the process of figuring out how I can help in the global initiative to stop child abuse. For now- everyone please stop and look around you. Keep in mind that  these predators live amongst us and that we cannot afford to be ignorant. Talk about it with people- because knowledge is indeed power.

Dora.. Out.. Woof.

From Dance to Everything

It has been close to two months since I started one hour dance practices every Thursday morning. I’m a morning person per se but my schedule has shifted over the years. Now I go to bed past midnight and I wake up late. So waking up early for this dance session is fairly challenging for me. It hasn’t been so bad since I have a friend to practice with. My friend, who suggested the idea and who has been a great influence on me as far as dance, lives across my home. She and I every Thursday morning (and we have not missed a session so far) are up by 6 o'clock. The biggest challenge is getting out of the bed but once I’m up, it gets easy. Inside the dance studio which is just ten minutes from my home, it is very cozy and pleasant. I love mornings for that reason. Everything is calm and pure, you can feel all the living things still peacefully resting in their homes and you are one of the few awake and doing something productive! We start with some warm-ups, then go over adavus (steps) followed by dance pieces. I’m learning a cute Ganesha, Shiva, Parvathi and Murugan piece. The song is pleasant and to listen to it in the morning, makes it all the best.

It is funny that I enjoy classical bharatanatyam very much. I grew up not believing in God. I’m not joking here. I purely believed in science. Even now, if you ask me where I fit, I’ll say I’m more towards atheist than theist. For me things need to be explained and be seen. Lot of the influence comes from my dad. He is an atheist but he has full respect for others beliefs. My mum was spiritual but she never tried to impose her beliefs on to me, may be because she was afraid my dad would disapprove. But I loved going to Temples with my grandmother growing up. It was always peaceful and pure and you get to sample the holy water (usually has camphor and tulasi) and coconut slices and other dry fruits. It was after college through many influences, I started connecting science with religion, especially Hinduism. I loved listening to someone giving a scientific understanding of the mythological stories and terms used in Hinduism. Dance also has a great influence on me because I feel different kind of vibrations in my body after every class. I come out very peaceful and content. Sometimes, even just listening to good carnatic music brings those vibrations. That is when I started believing in something. Some force, some energy out there which I never noticed before and now I'm feeling it. There are days I tell myself, I’m not alone in this world, this life doesn’t end here, there is something more beyond. And it gets me excited. I look at nature, plants and animals, and I feel we are all connected. It is ironic that my dad lived on Tirumala Tirupati (on top of the hill) for three years on work basis. That was when I was born. I know that place is known to be corrupt but it is also one of the holiest places for Hindus. I never went back after my parents left that place. It is in the list of places that I want to see.

Still Breathing

Dear Garfield, Ender & Dora,

First off thanks for your concern regarding my rant in last blog. I have come to terms with that I am an emotional puppy dog and not like Barney Stinson. Anyways I will try to be happy it maybe a while.
We are all very different personalities and this blog has really helped me understand each on of you better.
Ender - I can relate to your troubles to some extent. The burden of parents expectations has always weighed me down. Somehow I feel I need their approval (Mom's) for everything. I have tried hard but to let go but can't. I guess you just have to find a balance. I think I found mine. As Stewie would say, it is very difficult to please everyone.  Your life is not a negotiation where all parties win-win.
I heard a speech somewhere about how a person with talent may always not be the winner but a person with the right attitude can go long ways. A talented person may not know how to rise back once he fails but a person with the right attitude does. One should hire the latter as that person knows how to get past a failure. This is random but isn't that the whole idea of this blog? I just think Garfield could use it for a MBA case discussion.

I also learnt over this weekend that i am a ticking time bomb about to explode...ask me why? I have little to no patience left for people. Actually let me rephrase it - I have to little to no patience for people I don't care or don't know ...you people are safe - actually more like my pacifiers. Several people who I didn't know at at friends party made snide comments about my costume. I still get upset when I think about it...was it cause I cant take criticism or was it because I don't know how to take criticism from unknown people. I finally had to go get some booze with Dora to pacify myself. Am i turning into a Hulk? I really need to remove these frustrations. I am 29 and feel like 59. I need a break!

--Stewie

Fortune Cookies

A dear friend and I had delicious Chinese dinner saturday night. The best part for me of eating Chinese food, is the fortune cookie! My fortune was: Fear is the darkroom where pessimism is developed. After that we came back to my place and were joined by Ender. So as is custom for a Halloween weekend, we started talking about scary events that we have been a part of. We talked about seeing our loved ones pass away, about stalkers stalking and visitors from the other side. On Sunday I saw this show that spoke about rags to riches story and the one common theme that all the rich people had was the ability to overcome their fear. For instance, one story was about how this person sold encyclopedias door to door. Essentially the message he wanted to convey was that successful people are those who give the same enthusiasm on the 51^st door as on the 1^st door. Successful people face the fear of getting rejected with optimism. This brings me to something Stewie, Ender and I did on Monday.

Stewie, Ender and I went trick or treating. For Stewie and Me this was our first ever! Needless to say we were all nervous, with Stewie feeling embarrassed that he had to part take in this nonsense. As we approached our first door, my heart was beating fast. I couldn’t tell my friends that I was nervous about ringing the door bell and saying the three words. I couldn’t tell them that I feared that the person behind the door would deny us of candies and remind us that the candies were for kids. I couldn’t tell them that I felt that I couldn’t be strong for all of us. Despite all of these thoughts running through my head, I rang the bell. We all stood there in silence to what seemed a very long time… And then someone came out and gave us our share of the candy. I was so nervous that I don’t even remember whether the person was a male or female. All I remember is starting noticing who the people behind the doors were after the first house. I remember that our second house had a young father who came out to give us candy while cuddling his little darling.  

I wanted to go for trick-or-treat not for the candies and perhaps not so much for the experience. I wanted to see whether I could gather the guts to ring the door bells and ask people for something that was not meant for me but was desired by me. I don’t know if this makes sense.

To me seeing people support three adults in their attempt to live a part of childhood that they didn’t get to, made me firmly believe that if you go and put yourself out there the world will embrace you. Some will give you the dirty looks but at the end the faces you will remember are the ones that were kindest to you.

Thank you, Austinites for teaching me this very important lesson. I know someday I will use this for greater good.

Sending positive energy out to everyone,

Garfield